Thursday, December 24, 2009

White House Christmas Special

I know, this has nothing to do with my baking, cooking or school. But, as you read on the gingerbread portion of the blog, I love the white house Christmas special normally aired on HGTV. How pissed, and yes I'm using the crude and non-ladylike term again, pissed was I that the show was given to the annoying-president-picking-emotional-ratings-whore-richer-than-god Oprah! Really? Do we really need anything else promoted, chosen, shown or even endorsed by this woman? Wasn't our president enough for her?

She stole, yes stole, the best show of the year from the sweet Joan Steffend and turned it into a bastardization of it's former self. Joan wasn't there to promote her politics, see herself on television or show off her latest weight. She was there to praise the hard work of all the every-day people who worked thousands of hours to make the white house look as good as possible for the holidays. She took pride in the theme, the colors, the tree. She praised the hard work, the hours volunteers donated to hang and fluff garlands and wreaths. And most of all she actually took pride in showing the best of the best, the gingerbread creation that year.

Not Oprah. Noooooo. That is way to simple and base for a woman whose goal in life is manipulating the American public into thinking everything she says in unique, intelligent and the best ever. Oprah showed me two, I repeat two complete decorations in the house. We spent more time petting the dog than looking at the gingerbread house! Did we see the entry way that was adorned with 10 foot tall nutcrackers last year? Nope. Did we see the balcony, wreaths, garland and theme of the hallways and anterooms that can house 10 foot high poinsettia trees? Nope. We walked down a hallway with the First Lady who made mention of the new holiday photographs from administrations past but didn't even bother to do a close up of the wreaths in the window. They were red (but we got a 2 minute diatribe earlier on the playground/habitat that had been constructed on the lawn for the two kids), that's all we got.

We did see the tree in the oval office, after all, Oprah gets to chat with the president. Who better to chat, discuss and influence national decisions than a talk show host whose greatest contribution of the decade was the couch jumping incident of '05. What did we learn, there were dried hydrangeas in the tree, Oprah loved that idea.

We did see the red room, all decorated in cranberries (or so I could guess from the one garland we saw. We did see the tree in the blue room (you know, the main tree that is decorated with ornaments from around the country) and I could only guess at the theme of recycling because all they shared was how they sent out old ornaments from holidays past (money saving you know, after all the Christmas vacation house for the first family in Hawaii is $4000/day, priorities) for people to decoupage for their state, city or reservation. Not cute, they reminded me of the soap we made in Awana for the old people's home when I was 8.

We did see the gingerbread house encased in white chocolate and a little 3 minute spot on it being made. Ok, I'll give her that one. She did show it but made sure to highlight the miniature gumpaste garden & hypo-allergenic dog that made it different this year, cause we all know the First Lady is out weeding and tending that propaganda beauty on a daily basis. Yeah.

All told we saw 10 minutes of decorations and holiday cheer. The first 10 minutes were with the President spewing crap. 10 minutes of decorations, sorta. Then 40 minutes of more crap with the President sitting in the green room... no decorations highlighted. It was all about his politics and agenda. That is NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT what this is supposed to be about. Why must Oprah always strip all that is good and holy about being American from us? Why can't she just fly out to California and get her eyebrows waxed instead of stealing my one December joy. Why?

I'm so sad. It's just not the same without Joan. That's my dream job you know, working in the white house. Not for any administration or political agenda but for the house. Keeping something so precious in top shape and well presented. Being able to possibly bake or create something for a dinner in the East Room. And the ultimate, helping decorate this landmark for Christmas. I think my dream is dead. I haven't been this whipped up since the Chinese gymastic olympic uniforms... ugh, don't remind me. Well, happy holidays (cause with Oprah you can't say Christmas) and I wish you all the joy and happiness that Oprah has stolen from me this year.

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